Ok, here's the thing. Ever since I found out I was pregnant (which was like the very first second a home pregnancy test would reveal it), I've been wondering about what it's going to be like to have two kids. So, moms of two or more....I need your advice. Please feel free to be as specific and long-winded as possible. :) Also, to my friends who are pregnant with their seconds: I need your advice too, on how you are planning for the new addition.
Here are some questions to start you thinking: What types of things did you buy/are you buying for baby #2? Double stroller? If so, what kind? Second crib or toddler/big bed for the older one? Another monitor? Any other suggestions?
What did you do to keep the first kid occupied during all the time you were feeding/holding the new kid? Don't be afraid to tell me if the answer is TV or movies.
How did the first kiddo react to the baby? Did you do anything to ease the transition?
Thanks in advance!
8 hours ago
Please post anything you learn! Two kids seems impossible to me right now....especially with a non- sleeping 6 month old.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on baby #2! Xoxo
Hey Laura! And for those of you who don't read Facebook, here are the answers I've gotten there so far. Looks like I might need to break them into a couple of comments.
ReplyDeleteShannon
stroller: http://www.babytrend.com/sit_n_stand/ ours came with an attachment to put on that would attach an infant carrier on the front seat. This worked great. I could even cart three kids on it...one in the front, one sitting and one standing. handling of it is GREAT. We got a big graco one and it was impossible to steer....once you get the weight of the kids, it's not as easy as it was in the store!
we got a second crib. kept the kids in the cribs until they climbed out...that is when we knew they were ready.
baby 1 will be very interested in baby 2. they will entertain themselves, or sometimes just need to pop in a movie to entertain them for a little while.
Minda
best double stroller in my opinion is the twin combi, it is side by side but really sturdy and folds up pretty small (it was smaller than our single stroller that we have now), try a new bed first and see if it works otherwise use a portable crib for the baby until he is ready for the big bed, occupying kids is always a challenge I don't have advise but you will figure it out
Meg
Occupy kid 1 while feeding kid 2: reading a book to them really worked well for me. Singing with them. Saying that it's time to sit and watch Sesame Street for a couple minutes can work sometimes (or the show of Jack's choice). You can have Jack do artwork at the coffee table while you feed next to him on the floor or couch (assuming that's comfy for you and Jack won't eat crayons or color himself).
I've heard great things about BOB double strollers.
When we had Sean we moved Hyrum to a regular toddler bed. When we had Emmett we just got a second crib (borrowed). Andrew was a bit small for a big boy bed. It seems like it's going to be specific to Jack. If he can already get out of his crib really well on his own then you might just think of a bed.
Lauren
We have a baby trend sit and stand as well, and I do like it. Although my double jogger is one of my favorite strollers ever, just because it handles so easily. Only problem- mine doesn't fit through a standard door, that's common in side by sides, so watch out for that. If you do go for a sit and stand, there are other brands than baby trend that are shorter, but I forget which kind it is. :)
As for what to do with child #1- I'm not a good one to ask, one time when I was zonked out on the couch with Graham as a tiny infant, I was vaguely aware of Nate doing something, and awoke to find all of the baby toys in the bathroom- wet- he did not know how to turn on the sink at the time...
Mostly, don't try to potty train Jack any time soon- I potty trained Graham when Olivia was only 3 months old, and as soon as I started to feed her, or rock her to sleep, that's when Graham would need to go to the bathroom. Just take care of Jack's needs first as often as you can when you are going to feed the baby.
Mandy
Occupying the other is a challenge. It takes them getting use to not being the only kid. I had a bubble machine that was easy for Preston to turn off and on. So, I could tell him, "Go play with the bubbles." It worked sometimes. You'll do great.
Jeanette
I never had a double stroller. I used a baby carrier (like Bjorn for babies) for the infant and the stroller for the 14 month old. They were both in front of me and I liked it. After six weeks in the cradle for the baby the oldest went to a queen bed and gave up the crib. He didn't really have a choice. That is what we had and that is what he did. That is what we had and it worked just fine. We lived in a small place so the play area and the living room were the same. My kids kept busy with toys while I fed the baby right in the same room. Sometimes I changed diapers right on the floor (no changing table) so they were not worried I was gone somewhere else.
Natalie
ReplyDeleteI agree with Minda on the stroller. That's the one we have and we love it. I had one that you could put the baby seat in and then a child in front and it was almost impossible to turn!! The combi also fits through a standard door.
And my only advice for multiple kids is to drink lots of Pepsi. Since we don't drink alcohol...that's the closest thing. :)
Lindsay
1#-I splurged and bought a double BOB stroller.The best money I have ever spent! I run,rollerblade,walk, basically everything with it:)
2-learn to become easy going.I am so not laid back,but the more you have the more laid back you have to be:)
Kami
Everyone's different, but here goes on my take:
Double strollers are good if you're the "go for a walk every morning and have a special place in the garage just for the stroller" type. They're beasts, but they can be useful. I just couldn't bring myself to buy one of those titanics after watching so many miserable-faced mommas try to navigate them through stores, take them in and out of cars, etc, etc. But for walks on open quiet roads, one could be nice.
What I've done instead is a baby carrier (for the baby :) ) and an umbrella stroller (for the toddler). Love the Chicco one we just got because you truly can pop it open and pop it closed with one hand (and your foot). I tried a pouch with our most recent bambino, but it just didn't work for us. :P Baby Bjorn carriers are pretty good, though, for when babies are tiny. We bought a used one for pretty cheap when our oldest was born. When the baby gets bigger, I highly recommend an Ergo carrier. Wearing your baby with an Ergo feels like wearing a school backpack. Pretty simple and easy stuff - and it frees up your hands for helping your toddler while keeping the baby happy, too.
We always move the youngest onto a rest mat (or toddler bed) long before the next one comes so they don't feel like the baby is taking his/her bed. It's worked great - no problems. (I probably just jinxed myself - lol.)
Soon before the baby is born, something that's helped with the transition a bit is having the older sibling pick out a present to give to the baby. Talk about the exciting event coming, build their excitement, etc. Then your toddler can bring the special present to the hospital - and it sort of helps with his understanding and bonding when he gives the gift to the baby.
Have lots of "special" things on hand for when you're nursing/feeding the baby, as that will be prime time for your little guy to test the limits and get into stuff. Short movies, special snacks (or a meal), reading with me, or just a special book helped things stay more manageable when feeding the baby. That said, still be prepared for the oh-so-awkward nursing the baby and walking (or interrupting the baby and all the mess and screaming that entails) and picking up the toddler with the other hand....for those times where it gets too quiet - or you hear water running - etc.... :P
So glamorous. ;)
Anyhoo - hope this helps. I'd better get to bed - or sharing time's going to be a massacre tomorrow. :P
Jennie
ReplyDelete've heard that your baby won't know they had to wait a few extra minutes while you got kid #1 settled with a book or snack or show, etc, so it's ok to let the baby cry a little longer to ensure kid #1 is not forgotten/jealous. I'll let you know soon if this method truly works :)
Cassidy
I like the double stroller that is as close to an umbrella as possible...still can push 2 but don't have to lug it everywhere...don't spend too much though...I don't think it's worth it. We transitioned Brylie into a toddler bed at 14months...she fell out once and has been great ever since. We did have the baby in our room for a few months so that could increase the time. I found that I was the one who was less ready for that transition than she was. I let Brylie wait when I helped the baby...in the first 6 months, you have to let the new baby know that when they cry, you will come. That's their only way of telling you they need something and you need to allow the baby to create that trust. Make things fun...give Jack his own "baby" doll when the baby comes home from the hospital so he doesn't feel left out when you are feeding the baby, changing diapers whatever and let him be close when you are feeding. The new baby will get used to whatever. Brylie and Brody always shared a room...now, neither wakes up when the other cries in the night and they are great friends. Don't worry too much about it...the Lord sends the capability with the new baby! And you guys are great to begin with!!!
I found this NYT article recently that seems to have some good advice. I'm in the same boat as you right now, trying to learn as much before Baby #2 arrives in less than two months!
ReplyDeletehttp://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/10/07/going-from-one-child-to-two/
Congrats on baby #2! I hope things are going well with the pregnancy. Looks like you've gotten plenty of feedback so I won't include advice unless I can think of something that others haven't said...
ReplyDelete